Guest Author Sarah M. Anderson on Vanilla Sex
Posted by Kate Carlisle Jul 4 2012, 12:05 am
I’m excited to welcome my fellow Desire author Sarah M. Anderson back to the Lair! To celebrate the July 4th holiday, Sarah will discuss that great patriotic subject, SEX!
Sarah: It’s great to be back here at Romance Bandits! Today, we have a Very Important Question to answer: What is Vanilla Sex?
Vanilla sex has been getting a lot of attention recently, what with that book (you know, that book) supposedly showing the world that some people may have sex that’s not in the missionary position. Gasp!
So now that the media has beaten us all over the head with exciting, new, condescending terms (I’ll deck the first person who calls my Desires “Mommy Porn” and then, just to be sure, I’ll kick them when they’re down) that indicate just how Very Very Shocked we all are that some people enjoy non-traditional sex, what are we left with?
Vanilla sex. You know, instead of sex that requires whips or chains or—for the really erotic stuff—legally binding contracts, just regular, everyday sex. The kind people have when they’ve been married for, oh, I don’t know, any time longer than a year.
But what is vanilla sex? So we’ve ruled out whips, chains, and legal documents. Luckily, none of those things ever come into play in my Desires. (Okay, okay—I’ll cop to the fact that, with a three-book series I call “Lawyers in Love,” there may be a legal document here or there. But it NEVER regulates sexual positions, swear!)
How far can you go and still be able to call your sex ‘vanilla’?
Once upon a time, there was the missionary position. Man-on-top, woman-on-her-back. There’s nothing wrong with this, but I think it’s pretty much the definition of vanilla sex. Everyone seems able to accomplish this one position without needing a starter manual.
At some point, some enterprising people thought, hey, why does the guy always have to be on top? What if we were to get wild and reverse that? I’m sure that, at the time, that was considered Really Out There, but now it’s pretty vanilla, too.
Then there’s what’s called ‘doggie style,’ or from behind. (Personally, the phrase ‘doggie style’ is a close second to ‘mommy porn’ in terms of how fast it can lead to my eyelid involuntarily twitching). This can go a bunch of different ways, from spooning (usually quiet sweet) to, well, much, much hotter. The nice thing about this position is that it lends itself to a bunch of different surfaces. And that’s all I’m going to say about that.
But now we have erotica and porn (and no, THEY ARE NOT THE SAME THING) and suddenly everyone’s pushing all sorts of limits. Reverse Cowgirl? Sure! (Yes, I had to look that one up. That’s a sure sign that you’re old/married, when you don’t know the latest sexual slang.) Ménage? If you like! Backdoor? Um, okay? BDSM? I guess?
And thus, we come to the definition of Vanilla Sex: The kind of sex that you are comfortable having, receiving, and giving on a regular, long-term basis. It’s the kind of sex that never makes you feel nervous or awkward (well, usually, anyway), hardly ever requires special accessories, and rarely leads to someone spraining one or more important muscle groups attempting to pull off.
How do you define vanilla sex? (Let’s keep it clean, people!)
Leave a comment below and one lucky person will get an autographed copy of A Man of Privilege (which contains both vanilla sex and not-so-vanilla sex!). Plus—bonus—every week I’m giving away one of these handcrafted (by me!) book necklaces from everyone who commented throughout the week! Check the Authorial Moms blog every Sunday to see if you were the winner!
A Man of Privilege Blurb: She isn’t what he expected.
Blue-blood lawyer James Carlson is working on the case of his life. After winning this trial, his career will be set. He won’t let anything…or anyone… alter his course. Then he meets his witness.
Maggie Eagle Heart makes him question everything–his family, his goals, his future. Because she’s the one woman he wants, and she’s the one woman who is completely off limits. Yet even as he struggles to keep their relationship all about business, he can’t deny the attraction is mutual–and irresistible.
James has always done what is expected of him…until now.
Bio: Award-winning author Sarah M. Anderson may live east of the Mississippi River, but her heart lies out west on the Great Plains. With a lifelong love of horses and two history teachers for parents, it wasn’t long before her characters found themselves out in South Dakota among the Lakota Sioux. She loves to put people from two different worlds into new situations and to see how their backgrounds and cultures take them someplace they never thought they’d go.
When not helping out at school or walking her rescue dogs, Sarah spends her days having conversations with imaginary cowboys and American Indians, all of which is surprisingly well-tolerated by her wonderful husband and son.
This post is brought to you as part of the A Man of Privilege/Distinction Blog Tour. For a complete tour schedule and rules, visit www.sarahmanderson.com. Comments on this blog will be entered to win a signed copy of A Man of Privilege. Next tour stop is July 5: Novel Thoughts A Man of Privilege is available! Visit your favorite bookseller, at Amazon, or for the Nook.
Posted in harlequin desire, sex